Mariya lectures her audience on the dangers of sneezing while driving and other mundane hazards. Reporter Tom Risen arrives late to start interviewing Mariya for the website BrightestYoungThings.com.

Mariya and Tom re-enact Tiger Woods sexts. Tom interviews Mariya about her love affair with radio and comedy.

Mariya welcomes Iraq war veteran-turned-peace-activist Josh Stieber on the show. We learn about basic training, the emotional difficulty of having to kill another person, and where soldiers poop. http://contagiousloveexperiment.wordpress.com/

More with handsome peace activist Josh Stieber. We learn about his mental shift from soldier to hippie, his appreciation of meditation and vegetarianism, and more. Check out his website: http://contagiousloveexperiment.wordpress.com/

Mentally challenged listener Tom Gavin calls in and claims to be engaged. Thanksgiving "fun". Mariya's sister accuses her of being emotionally abusive.

Black Friday shopping with family. Sexy improv enthusiast Christi Milton calls in. Mariya's best friend Ron Charnis calls in to discuss his recent disturbing conversation with a pedophile from the Czech Republic and new research about homosexuality.

Celebrating Oprah's imminent departure. Review of the movie "Precious" and Mariya's life in the ghetto. Camel toes and you.

Mariya's heartfelt monologue inspired by "Talk Radio". Quick look at news headlines. Japanese pornography is scary. Mariya explains yet again why she hates Oprah, so Danny the Tranny calls in to defend her.

Mariya is furious with Oprah's interview of Charla Nash, the chimp attack survivor with no face. Mariya is courting feisty senior citizens as interview subjects. More fun with monologues. Former Miss California Carrie Prejean refuses to answer Larry King's questions.

Mariya bleeds for comedy. The importance of supporting the local arts scenes. Sad lonely Mariya needs more reliable friends.

Another episode of Mariya's Radio Theater. This week's piece: "Bad Therapist". No one wants to be Mariya's co-host. Jon Stewart lampoons Glenn Beck. Anh Joseph Cao - the little Asian Republican that could...vote for a perverse version of healthcare reform.

Mariya's # fan calls in. Surviving without Internet. A rant on politics. Crying - Mariya's favorite new hobby.

Mariya's quaint domestic life. Comedy - how dirty is too dirty? Mariya discovers Monty Python. Another foray into the world of Radio Theater - "Bad Advice with Dear Blossom".

Mariya had reservations about her guest, journalist Tom Risen, who is lost and running late. Tom arrives and explains why journalists and comedians are always drunk.

A woman gets denied medical coverage because rape is a preexisting condition. Where people keep their journalistic integrity. Tom says Ralph Nader doesn't use email. Mariya doesn't know how to make a pitch. Sex in the workplace. Mariya's mysterious encounter with a well-known comedian.

The premier of Mariya's Radio Theater series. This week's feature: The Postman. Former co-host comedian Pete Bergen calls in to say hi. Obama's Nobel Peace Prize.

An self-proclaimed superhero who calls himself Flu Man calls in. Mariya's thoughts on stand-up comedy and creative pursuits in general. Thoughts on etiquette. End of show fun with Sara Caso.

Pete left the show and Mariya's friend Matt is there to pick up the pieces. A 56-year-old woman unnecessarily admits to being a virgin at a hearing she believes to be about sex education. Mackenzie Phillips and her incenstuous love with her dad. Discussion about celebrity and artistic integrity. Andy Milonakis' new song about Twitter.

The one and only Tom Gavin invades the studio. Oprah may stop doing her show after this season! Lybian President Muamar Qaddafi Rants at UN Summit. A census worker is ritualistically murdered in Kentucky. Glenn Beck may have boiled live frogs on his show. Mariya is uncertain about the future.

Pete is away again. A young aspiring boxer named Lou visits Mariya. A caller named Jonathan suggests that Glenn Beck is angry because his girlfriend cheated on him with a black man. Mariya tries to scare Lou into caring about politics and healthcare reform. What to do when you're disillusioned with the world.

Robert Reich explains the public healthcare option. Mariya votes Obama for dictator. Mariya discovers Google PalTalk and records voice conversations in a conservative chatroom. ACORN employees get fired for trying to help a woman posing as a prostitute obtain housing.

Healthcare reform town hall meetings keep reaching new lows. Pete's adorable girlfriend Brook is visiting. Poolside wardrobe choices. Mariya's stand-up cherry finally got popped. No segment is complete without Tom Gavin. Healthcare and education discussion. Mariya rants about going to school in Soviet Ukraine. Pete's mom tried to help him with his academic endeavors by creating rap songs.

A healthcare reform protester has his finger bit off during a fight at a town hall meeting and becomes Neal Cavuto's hero. Obama wants to brainwash all the children into school-loving communists. Mariya salsa danced at a co-worker's wedding. Auditioning sucks. Mariya wants more improv.

Mariya shaved her legs. Ted Kennedy's legacy. Robert The Drunk says hello. Glenn Beck doesn't know how to spell "oligarchy" and doesn't know what words mean. Special needs listener Tom Gavin's dating habits.

Rush Limbaugh wants to protect your penises and isn't on anyone's balls. Special needs listener Tom Gavin wants to date Mariya. What Obama plans to do with your foreskins. A serial cat murderer was caught in Miami. New female listener calls in.

Mariya and Pete are reunited after two weeks apart and Pete has a surprise on his lip! Encyclopedia forgot his sound effects machine at home. Pete's review of Del Close Marathon in New York. Hot girls with douchebags. Facebook stalking and relationship statuses. Robert the Drunk calls in. Mariya's first love reappears.

The healthcare reform debate is getting ridiculous. Mariya rants about Democracy.

Mariya's guests are lost. Mariya welcomes her guests Jon C and Delvin on the show. Jon's musical career and Delvin's novel. Healthcare reform is getting ass-raped.

Does Ann Coulter have an Adam's apple? Mariya gets personal with her guests Jon C and Delvin. Mariya might be a gay man. Is it better to sleep naked? Mariya's sick sad life.

Janey Poo is visiting. Encyclopedia is not fired after all. The importance of healthy bowel movements. Healthcare reform debate. Mariya is on a mission to help frigid young women achieve "happiness". Pete checks in from his family reunion. Mariya suspects a liberal blog of stealing her Sarah Palin haiku idea. Janey reviews the Chinese Menu improv show at the DC Arts Center. Mariya wants to re-fire Encyclopedia.

The Republican conspiracy to undermine the healthcare bill. MTV reality shows are comedic gold and tragic sewage. Awkward moments between Mariya and Encyclopedia. Encyclopedia hates Indian people. The mystical world of the Hari Krishnas. Special needs listener Tom Gavin went to a radio conference. Sarah Caso is having technical difficulties.

Show Encyclopedia is on hiatus for personal reasons. Pete's girlfriend Brooke visits. Make-out styles discussion. Pete beat someone up. Professor Gates is half Irish. Friends don't let friends be molested by people with colostomy bags. Tips for successful brown-nosing. Conspiracy theories. A 5-year-old blues singer makes Pete very upset.

Mariya's review of "Public Enemies". Having sex at your parents' house - hot or not? Pete chastises Mariya for her personal hygiene. Mariya's mysterious personal life. Top 5 celebrity "To Do" lists. Pete loves Kim Kardashian.

Mariya and Pete are finally reunited. The leisurely activities of the privileged are often strange and dangerous. Discussion on guns. Mariya's stalker log. Pete's shameless plugs.

Lively phone calls: CBS News director Mark White, improv enthusiast/financial blogger Phillip Millman, President Bill Clinton, and mentally challenged listener Tom Gavin. Professor Gates vs. Cambridge Police and racism in general. Trying to dig up dirt on Walter Cronkite. Indian girls plow fields naked to embarrass the weather gods. Chris Brown's apology.

Pete is injustifiably absent. Pete interviewed president of The Valley Swim Club, John Duesler. Mariya is considering a firing spree, and thinks she found a creative soul mate. Oprah's follies.

David Arquette likes "Latino" women. Liberal vs. Conservative media. The moral implications of human-canine sex. Is Judge Sotomayor more racist than any of the white senators accusing her of racism? Fox News likes Sotomayor's fashion sense. A British health organization is promoting PLEASURABLE sex in schools.

Pete is away visiting family. Mariya's health update - drugs are good. Mariya reviews the star-studded "Chinese Menu" show at the DC Arts Center. The world in the aftermath of Michael Jackson's death - it still exists.

Some conservatives are of the belief that the only way to protect the American people from a terrorist attack is to incite a terrorist attack. Sarah Palin's resignation from her gubernatorial post in Alaska. Gay Rabbi Ari Litvack calls in.

Celebrity deaths also conveniently come in three's. The causes of anal cancer are as bad as one might suspect from the nature of the disease. Iranian authorities blame the CIA for the violence during protests. Rush Limbaugh blames President Obama for Senator Sanford's Argentinian affair and wants to give Judge Sotomayor a vacuum cleaner. Pete is putting on a show at the DC Arts Center on July 3.

Political apologies are funny. Michael Jackson's music was good until the end. Mariya is developing a stand-up routine. David the Performer calls in. Misguided clergymen vs. homosexual demons. Conservative radio host Michael Savage is a savage. Is President Obama right about Iran?

The show is experiencing technical difficulties. Mariya hates Meghan McCain. Mariya got rear-ended by a cab driver. Andy Dick protested McDonald's and their chicken-slaughtering practices. Iran is oh so far away.

Mariya is worried about going to All Good music festival. Pete's improv-teaching experience. David the Performer calls in. Mariya received a devotional prayer book as a gift.

Dave Letterman is only guilty of unfunny jokes. Mariya had her first performance at the DC Improv and didn't suck that much. The Gay Pride Parade in DC was beautiful. Mariya lost her car. Mariya is inspired to be a vegan once again. A strange phone call.

Should Obama be more like George Bush? Fundamentalist Pastor Drake prays for Obama and everyone else he doesn't agree with to die. The extremely self-loving Dave Matthews likes to explode on stage. Pete and Shawn will perform at the Del Close Improv Marathon in NYC and Mariya wants to go to hobnob with famous funny people. Mariya has a hot but linguistically challenged stalker in Tunisia.

Pete is not gay. David Carradine died of erotic asphyxiation or was murdered by Kung Fu assassins. President Obama didn't honor National Prayer Day - thank god! Mariya goes on a righteous rant about the rights of the downtrodden. Rush Limbaugh thinks that President Obama wants to take over the media, even though Rupert Murdoch already beat him to it.

Mariya went to see a concert and ran into a stalker ex-boyfriend. People don't dress up for concerts anymore. The lead singer of Denali is hot. More "brilliance" from the ladies of The View. Reality TV is coming to DC.

Mariya has new roommates. Mariya met her # 1 fan. Mariya and Pete discuss Judge Sotomayor. Pete had an unfortunate encounter with Chris Duhon. Former co-host Jenn is engaged. Improv geekdom.

Not everyone is Mariya's biggest fan. STD phone calls. Dancing: to gay or not to gay? The merits and downfalls of being a "sneakerhead" and more about shoes.

Pete is out of town. Gay Rabbi Ari Lickvac and show encyclopedia VJ Kapur in studio. The wonder that is Jewish motherhood. Mariya's cats have a spark of the divine. Is there boy-touching in synagogues? Special needs listener Tom Gavin calls in.

Oxygen Network talk show host Sue Johanson discusses queefing and rimming, much to Rabbi Lickvac's dismay. Hit FOX TV Show "So You Think You Can Dance" is accused of homophobia for rejecting a same-sex ballroom dancing couple. Dick Cheney refuses to stop defending torture.

Mariya is upset about a misunderstanding with an improv classmate. More young bright comedians are paying attention to the show, much to Mariya's delight. A British man avoids jail time for buying his 14-year-old son a hooker.

Mariya's best friend Ron is in studio to psychoanalyze Mariya and talk politics. Mariya bought a typewriter to help her write more creatively. Ron's unique medical condition.

Ron tries to test Mariya's faith in Obama. Conspiracy theories.

Mariya gives great dating advice. Sean Hannity wants to be waterboarded to prove that its not torture. Peggy Noonan wants to keep walking. Beauty pageants are comedy gold.

Beauty pageants are all about integrity. Mariya is a good spammer. The pig flu is upon us. Jamie Foxx wants Miley Cyrus to do drugs and get chlamydia.

Peter attempts to call in. Islam and Christianity are like Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny. Mariya and VJ dont want to discuss each others past love lives. Gary and Mariya share an embarrassing secret. Mariya and Gary recall fun times with special needs listener Tom Gavin. Fun with infomercials.

Oprah gives the worst commencement speeches and likes to be ridden horsey on all fours. Infomercial stars like to rape and brutalize hookers.

Mariya and Pete discuss musical preferences and pornography. Mariya knows a girl who used to be in porn.

Mariya and Pete appreciate Barack Obamas sense of humor. RNC chairman Michael Steele gives a ridiculous interview to GQ magazine. 14 year old conservative Johnathan Krohn needs to be punched or pantsed.

Mariya hates Ayn Rand. China wants to collect its debt in America. Tom Gavin the special needs listener calls in.

Jim Cramer gets reamed out by Jon Stewart for helping financial institutions instead of his viewing audience. Mariya had her first improv class.

Fox News wrongly reports that Beer Pong gives you Herpes. Mariya and Pete ponder angry retards. Mariya likes Woody Allen. Pete has a man crush on Matt Damon. The different degrees of funny.

Mariya introduces comedian Pete Bergen as her new co-host. Octomom made a 911 call. Rush Limbaugh tells bad jokes. Wayne LaPierre doesnt care if your butthole puckers.

Jenn is leaving the show and Mariya is devastated. Comedian Sean OBrien visits. Everyone has similar bacteria in their mouths. Saving a life can get you a jaywalking citation. Hate group memberships are soaring.

Mariya is still heart-broken over Jenn leaving the show. Mariyas best friend Ron is back from Israel. Hanging out with old school hippies is fun. Bobby Jindal is laughable.

Rush Limbaugh and his crazy Limbaugh Laws. Jenn has a scary darker side. Patrick didnt like Dimitri Martin.

Bill OReilley calls for the people of California to take to the streets with torches and pitchforks in response to Octomom. DJ Patrick Turner in studio. Barack Obama cologne is on the market. Rush Limbaugh gives sex advice. Recap of Moog at Red Maple last Thursday - Mariya got thrown around on the dance floor during Patricks set. Mariya was a fussy eater as a child. A disabled body-builder calls in.

Atheist rapper Petey Sugg calls in to share his art. Dick Cheney continues to be evil even in retirement. DJ Patrick Turner calls in to promote his weekly party and podcast.

Mariya is frustrated by mens behavior and wants to become a lesbian. Bill OReilley is at war with The New York Times. Dick Cheney is on another scare campaign. Wupac calls in to say hi. Mariya is angry abour Republican opposition to Obamas stimulus plan.

Mariya and Jenn recover from the terrible phone call that killed their first segment. Sarah Palin is out and about. Mariya and Jenn speculate about crashing a Young Republican party. John Thain of Merrill Lynch is ugly and stupid. Mariya went to see Thievery Corporation and went backstage to meet band members.

The Chinese government censored Obamas inaugural speech. More about the Federal Reserve and income tax. Scenesters are funny.

Mariya and Jenn discuss their inauguration celebration. Mariya rates her recent dates. The Federal Reserve is evil.